Friday, October 07, 2005

thoughts on this new life....

Today is one of those days, where I want to get up and be motivated and excited. Instead all I can think about is my new job and how much I just want to be in charge, in control, running the show, not playing second fiddle, not knowing more and being the one teaching the manager how to manage. Last night was slow so I was particularly critical, but the guy just isnt a bartender, he has zero personality, he is not friendly etc, well I digress I wont bore you with the conversation I am having with myself on that front. So I drank a little too much to ease the pain of it all, and am struggling for my motivation, that and I did a 50 mile fixie ride yesterday before work, worked a split shift, you get the point I over did it a bit, but then again moteration never has been my strong point.
So this new life of bike commuting, and being back at my old job, so I am the new old guy, know the regulars, my fitness due to trying to come back is lacking and it is a point of contention for me, like climbing hills knowing that my former self would not be struggling, but that my current self is, whezing and feeling every inch of whatever size hill it may be. I know it is bad to compare, because after all "it is what it is and it isnt what it isnt" so why bother worrying about anything, the plan is set. Wow I really am full of phrases this morning, there is a word for these little phrases but I am unsure what it is, help. So yesterday I did a ride around Lake Washington, chasing the roadies with all their gears and hanging in quiet well I think. I rode with another co worker Chris who is equally fasinated by riding fixed, we ended up getting rained on, not having fenders I truely was soaked. On monday Kent and I will make fenders out of colorplast and I will be prepared. So I commuted to work in Fassbinders gear after returning from my ride, I was overdressed, hit the deck once, nothing bad, and was struck by the fact that Chris rode the whole ride with toe clips and converse all stars, I wonder how his arches felt. That and the fact that he was ripping along and he smokes. I tried to convince him that he would be much better off if he didnt smoke, not only for bike riding but just in general.

So my new life is like a work in progress, I havent settled in enought to get any kind of routine, which I hate, I am a creature of habit, I want some routine, I am stretchin right now, and worried about paying the mortage etc. Wow I am starting to scare myself. So if you are still reading this thanks.

I cant wait for Kents book to come out. Dont forget to pick up a copy of Dirt Rag and read an exerp from it

I should have a link for Gonterian's radio show and he may have a way to download the shows soon. rockin.

Sock orders, please keep them coming. new email is thanks.

I should be making some shirts of my own shortly, if not I may do the cafe press thing.

My legs feel like shit, I have to walk a lot at work, need to use some better shoes or at least get the superfeet back in the shoes.

Danielles sister just gave birth to a baby girl, we were up a bit of the early morning with crazed updates from her mother. It always scares the shit out of me when the phone rings at that time, thank god everything is a ok. they had to race to the hospital, got in a cop car well you get why I didnt sleep so well.

Lastly I hope to get out and do some riding with the .83 clan. Looks like a lot of fun. Fixie rides almost every night. sweet.

No comments: