Another Sunday in Hell....

While some were watching the week later airing of the Paris Roubaix, the original Hell of the North, we were out on a journey in the woods. What is with the week later airing of one of the best cycling events. Ever since that guy from Texas left the cycling coverage here in the states sure has gone down hill. Well enough about that. We had another great Sunday in Bellingham. The group was a bit larger the pace was still quite fast and the weather cooperated. We started off and ended on a trail called hush hush. My understanding is that this little technical number was illegally built, used to have a large log over the exit, and was scheduled for demolition. However instead it was adopted in. Now there is a big since at the exit stating that it is in fact "hush, Hush." We had it all on this ride a bit of climbing 4500 in the total 30 miles although that is a bit misleading as 400 of it was in the 12 miles of rail to trail to and from the actual ride. We encountered some snow, at the top of one of my favorite descents, black diamond, a flat or two, and some sunbreaks. All in all it was a good day on the bike. I wish I could say I have pictures, but alas the camera was left at home again. As always we finished the ride off at Boundary Bay with a few pints. The legs felt ok, just not to powerful, but all in all I had a great time. As always keep pedaling.

life takes over...

A wise man once said..."life is what happens in between plans." Ain't that the truth. The plans are still there it just seems that I have been spending more and more time occupied by work, sleep and not much else.

Legs are still feeling mushy.

Mind is a bit like pudding right now, oh and it just started to snow...couldn't think of anything better......

The plan is to take it day by day and hope for some more sun breaks, which will hopefully brighten and lift my spirits.

So life is certainly happening. I hope to get out this weekend for a ride or two, but the weather looks to be quite horrendous, with snow, wind and rain in the forecast. Maybe I'll just stay in and watch the Roubaix.

Spring is where, oh it was Saturday, I'm hoping for a week of summer sometime in the future.

Maybe it is all a plan to make me tuffer...like that spelling there.

trying to be wise.....

Here I am trying to learn from past mistakes, I am spinning, no longer on the fixie ever day, but on gears to work, lightening the load and trying as hard as I can to recover. Recover has always been just keep doing what I was doing, with maybe a few days of lite riding in between. Looks like that will have to change here for a bit. I have backed it off. Even catching up on some reading. I look at all the reasons that I could be feeling a bit worked over and they all make sense, just thought I was above it all, that somehow I was special. The plan is more of the same, rest, sleep and ride when it feels right. It won't be easy as I just want to be on the bike seeing new horizons, and riding the edge of it all.

This thing called wisdom sure feels like work sometimes. Balance, moderation but only in moderation......blah blah blah.....I just want to be out there riding, so sunday I am going to go out and see how the legs feel, if they don't I will have to cut the ride short for me in the interest of keeping my legs, body and mind healthy......ouch. I always feel like this will in someway be scene as weakness on my part, that I will be one of those full of excuses, but the body doesn't lie and the mind can only override it for so long before the body takes it revenge......lets talk about some lowpoints if we must......I have been there and never wish to return to that place again....it was a cold dark cave so to speak......so I am rolling with the punches and trying not to freak too much...i am prone to highs and lows and have been known to overreact to things....the challenge is to stay true to me and what it is I want and need......so I will keep fighting the good fight and pedaling as much as I can. Thanks for enduring the mental slobber for sure there will be more....as always keep those pedals turning, be it circles or squares.....

so I dropped off the face.....

I have been known from time to time to take a long time between updates. The list of reasons can be long sometimes so I won't bore you with the details. However I have been dealing with some personal issues that have interfered with my updates. From time to time I deal with loads of self doubt and depression this has been one of those times, add to that the feeling of lead in my legs and you have a perfect storm for me not to post, not to see the value in connecting to the outside world. I sit locked in my own head, battling the demons so to speak, and cycling is my drug. When even it doesn't feel right I get very scared. I am currently hoping that I did not push too hard too early in the season and wreck my sometimes fragile mental state. Since I over did it a few years back I have tread lightly, and my fitness has showed that. I fear I may have a smaller dose of that right now. My legs just ache a bit. I do have to stand at work etc. I don't think that it is as bad as it once was, I hope. So I will be spinning my legs to and from work for the next little bit in hopes that I turn the corner and my fitness can get back on track. I have trouble with limits and boundaries sometimes and tend to dive in to what ever it is head first, I just hope that I have not done it again so to speak. I am trying to learn from the past and have a depth and understanding, but it is not easy for me to slow down, when right now that is what I should do. I will probably go riding this weekend again the weather is just too nice to say no to. My timing is impeccable just as the sun comes out I have to take a rest. I ask is there any justice in this, and what is the lesson I am to learn. So I have been reading and resting and trying to smell the flowers. Heres to a good ride on Sunday, that refuels the spirit.